Have you ever been lied to
from someone you put your
entire trust in?
Years go by and what you know
to be truth
one day, someone comes along
and tells you is not.
Instead of becoming angry and upset
towards the one who told you the lie
you knew as truth,
you become angry and upset
with the one who spoke truth
not believing for a nano second
you have been lied to …
Oh no! Not by the someone you trusted!
You are stunned.
Your heart rate and blood pressure sky rocket
as you still do not believe the one
who is speaking truth
because all this time
you trusted someone
who played you unknowingly for a fool …
yet you obviously did not know.
Then along comes a second someone
who has your deepest respect
who confirms that the one
speaking real truth
is doing just that;
and now your behavior
seen in a different light
leaves you excruciatingly embarrassed,
wishing the earth would just open
to swallow you whole.
To make matters right,
being the mature adult you are,
you seek out the person who did speak truth
profusely apologizing for your
inappropriate childlike behavior
praying as you do so that all will be forgiven.
And if you are lucky enough
as I most certainly was
that person will show you kindness
and accept your apology,
knowing how hurtful a lie can be
and how deep betrayal can go.
In a world where truth matters not in the least
and to find someone who does not lie
nor who will compromise
is a Gift rare indeed.
And even though you may have acted
like a bafoon as I surely did
a sincere apology hits home
with someone of integrity
in order for matters to be set right.
Long story short: Too much in too short of a time span has occurred leaving my emotions raw and bloody. When an incident happened recently, all of my control, all of my discipline, flew instantaneously out the window and in their place was a screaming child, full of hurt and outrage. Friends, to be lied to and then betrayed, goes deep, at least to those of us who deem it their responsibility to walk Life in Truth and Love. Shocked to my core at my behavior, and then ending up with massive mud on my face, left me knowing I have some work to do regarding Ms. Anger who all along has been waiting to show Her face. And boy did She show her face!
No matter how much you “stuff” anger, that anger will manifest either in a disease, or like with me, suddenly without warning, creating a huge PA-BOOM! I learned as a child not to show my anger for if I did I was severely punished. I have some Inner Work to do so that this does not happen again. Ever. For those of you who have known me for a while, you know darn well, when I say I will work on something, that something will be worked on!
Photography/ “Lies And Betrayal”/ April 2019©AmyRose